Tuesday, May 02, 2006

On the lighter side, literally

A light bulb joke. HT: Jarrod Cochran

How Many Christians Does It Take to Change a Light Bulb?

Charismatic: Only 1 - Hands are already in the air.

Pentecostal: 10 - One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.

Presbyterians: None - Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Roman Catholic: None - Candles only. (Of guaranteed origin of course.)

Baptists: At least 15 - One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change.

Episcopalians: 3 - One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks, and one to talk about how much better the old one was.

Methodists: Undetermined - Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.

Nazarene: 6 - One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.

Lutherans: None - Lutherans don't believe in change.

Amish: What’s a light bulb?

American Fundamentalist Evangelicals: We will rally and organize to have our government overthrow activist judges who would liberally interpret laws to allow such evil lightbulbs to go unchanged. We will attempt to create a theocracy to keep anyone with another opinion about the lightbulb out of the public arena. Preemptive war will be declared on this dim bulb and all those who are against our efforts. Mid-way through this war of the lightbulb change our God-fearing president will land on an aircraft carrier and declare that the mission to change the bulb is accomplished! And there will be much rejoicing and reelecting.

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